A case for finally getting behind the wheel (and why every girl should do it sooner).
I got my driver’s license at 25. By that point, most of my friends had already clocked years of solo highway runs, road trips, and that particular ritual of crying in a parking lot. I had none of that, simply because I thought I was perfectly content riding shotgun for my entire adult life.
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I Know It’s Scary To Get Your Driver’s License…
Manila gives you every excuse not to drive. The streets are feral. EDSA is a fever dream of motorcycles weaving through gaps that don’t exist, sedans that treat lane markings as loose suggestions, and the occasional jeepney that will simply stop wherever it pleases because this is its home and you are a guest. Fear is a great convincer and it kept me very comfortable and very dependent for a long time.
But I thought about the moms. Specifically, a few acquaintances’ moms who never learned to drive because their husbands always did it for them. It’s a sweet arrangement until it isn’t. Until the husband is unavailable or gone. Or until these women want to go somewhere alone without coordinating their entire life around someone else’s schedule. I say this because I looked at that scenario and thought, “I do not want to be forty and stranded.” Call it feminist rebellion or call it practical. Call it a fear akin to that of the tragic alpine divorce: being kicked out of a car onto the SLEX curb with nothing but the clothes behind your back.
…But it’s Actually Kind of Fun
What nobody tells you enough is that driving is autonomy in its most literal, rubber-on-asphalt sense. Exhilarating independence aside, it’s genuinely fun. You’re alone, you have full control of the music, and for 20 minutes or two hours, your thoughts are entirely your own. There’s something almost meditative about it when you stop white-knuckling the steering wheel. Driving, when you let it, is actually one of the better places to just be.
I have a grandmother who learned to drive in the province at 12 years old, something she credits for her mental clarity even now, well into her eighties. She still drives and is sharper than most people I know half her age. Anecdotal? Sure. But you can take this grandmother data point over doing nothing.
There’s a barrage of valid excuses that delay getting behind the wheel. But the “I’m just a girl” thing is fun until it’s a cage. The helplessness bit, the overdone personality trait, the “I could never,” the mislabelled incompetence and waiting for someone else to take the wheel figuratively and literally—it’s a cute bit that ages terribly.
So, Girl, Just Get Your Driver’s License
Find a patient person who’ll sit in the passenger seat while you practice without making you feel stupid. Carve out the time. Survive your first solo drive to the grocery store. Then do it again, and again, until Manila traffic is just background noise and you’re just a person going somewhere.
Frequently Asked Questions
Yes, driving gives women independence and autonomy, so they’re never reliant on a partner, family member, or ride-hailing app to get around.
Manila traffic can be intimidating, but the chaos is manageable with enough practice. The key is finding a patient licensed driver to practice with before going solo.
Not at all. You can learn at any age. The important thing is that you start.
